Why most students (young and old) quit piano lessons
Last week on February 17th, 2025, I was teaching two of my favorite students. Two sisters one 11 and the other 14. They both love music and are very musically talented in their own respective ways. One of them however, is particularly ambitious. We have been working on a piano arrangement of the song, “Burn” from the musical Hamilton. The arrangement itself is fairly intermediate. However my student has only been playing for 5 months! And while we have covered many piano fundamentals, technique and basic note reading on the grand staff, we spent our 30 ish minute lesson on two measures!
Now it is not uncommon for piano lessons and practice to look this way! After all, to understand and coordinate both left and right hands on a particular song or passage and can take serious brain power. And this is when I became aware of something profound
See, after our lesson it was time for her older sister’s lesson. And her sister was sitting in and observing the whole time before it was her turn. And I spoke into the room something along the lines of, “Do you guys feel that?” What I felt, was that we used up a lot of brain power in our analytical, problem solving portion of our brains. Then sister #1 said, “Oh yeah like right brain”. And then a light bulb went off in my mind! Note: it is the left brain that is responsible for analytical thinking, problem solving, logic and our right brain is more for our emotions, spacial awareness, intuition and creativity
I began to remind the girls about the importance of using the right brain (even though I said left in the lesson) when playing piano and living life! If you remember blog post #1 where I spoke briefly about the benefits of meditation for musicians, I mentioned being in flow state. And although we had a great time working on those two measures, we were using our left brain primarily!
So with sister #2, we spent the lesson learning and playing my composition “C song”. Which is a basic 1, 6, 4, 5 song in C major with the melody being the major scale. Go to my Youtube to listen and learn it! This song is used as a vehicle for improvisation. After the melody is played, the chords are perfect to play basic riffs and motivs in C. And newer piano students and can just use the “C 5 finger scale”. I often put on drum tracks from youtube and we just jam and get lost in the music! THIS is more along the lines of using that right brain of ours.
After the second lesson, I spent a few minutes speaking with the girls about the importance of both aspects of our brains. And how when we learn a musical instrument we do have to use some portion of our logical brain. However, for sustained joy in the process of learning music, it is essential to learn to use our more intuitive emotional and spacial aware part of our brains. This is what a great music teacher can do for students!
In conclusion, student will more than likely quit piano lessons because it’s mentally exhausting. Kids are in their left brain for most of school and do not learn/practice yoga regularly. Adults work and take care of life resposibilites and therefore are also in their left brain. To add another left brain activity can burn oneself out. What we can and should do if we seek fulfilment for ourselves and our students is to be aware of this first and foremost and to then find ways to merge both of these ideas in and outside of the practice room.
Some practical tips for more balance and longevity could be:
Meditate daily, find peace in where your current skill level is
Approach the instrument with curiosity daily
Don’t learn music that is entirely too difficult
Leave the ego at the door, yes we all want to play Mozart, but it is not necessary to play Mozart to find joy at the piano. Perhaps ask, “Why do I want to play Mozart so badly?” (I’m just using Mozart as an example but we could easily replace it with any artist like Oscar Peterson or Led Zepplin)
Learn to find joy in friendship and bring that to music. Competition is cool but co creation is better
Play drums! Learn different drums grooves and styles. When I was in Middle and High school my friends and I were notorious for beating on the desks
Play along with songs
If you wish you were somewhere further along your musical path than you are, know it’s okay to feel the emotions around that. Perhaps you seek validation from being a great musician. I KNOW this from my own personal experience and it is something I am unlearning every day.
Pray for the answers to find you. Trust your intuition
Dance daily! Find a spot that feels safe and as Gunter in the movie “Sing” says, “Let the music take control of your body parts!”
Create deeper body/somatic awareness. Per my last point, imagine the bodily awareness a hip hop dancer has, a master yogi, or a belly dancer has! It has to be different than someone who doesn’t take part in movement practices like those mentioned. Find your home back in your body.
The Power of Meditation for Music Students
It all begins with an idea.
As musicians, we play our best when we feel our best! I’ll add to this and say that, we play our best when we can also get out of the way and allow the music to flow through us.
In the Disney movie, Soul, there is reference to a place they call, “The Zone.” As the movie describes it, it is “a place between the physical and the spiritual.”
Now this is great and all but what does this really mean?
It means that we play our best when we can tap into this “zone”! And in the zone, our sense of time becomes altered and we enter a deep flow state. Deeply immersed in whatever it is we are doing.
How to access the zone:
First off, we must understand that “The Zone” is one of a human being’s natural states.
As babies, toddlers, and children we are so connected to ourselves and our inner world made up of feelings, needs, interests, wants, emotions, talents, humor etc. The beautiful thing as well is that, in our earliest years we can be connected most to the state of JOY.
Joy is a state of being of contentment and of peace. It does not seek to change or enhance the present moment in anyway. It is fulfillment and gratitude. It is why babies, toddlers and children have the most pure energy. An aura of wonder.
Of course, we do live on planet Earth. And here on Earth there are many things that can inflict trauma on our developing brains and bodies. It is trauma that can ultimately disconnect us from ourselves. Because we have to lower the volume on joy and raise the volume on survival. The nervous system then becomes either hypo or hyper activated. Perhaps not 24/7 but when triggered by that thing or things, then it will turn on to stay alert and aware of the perceived/expected threat.
The good news:
No parents are perfect. But we all do our best with what we have been given in life ourselves!
And although we can disconnect from ourselves as we age, we can also begin to develop the skill of attuning to ourselves. We can begin to know thyself even from very very young ages.
How?
By finding the things that truly light us up on the inside.
Perhaps it’s music, perhaps its art, nature, building, designing, problem solving, dance, video games, cars, planes, science, history, church, spirituality, prayers, books, sports etc.
However there’s a catch! We should seek the things that light us up and inspire us to get up and take action, but we must do it from the heart always!
What am I really saying here?
I am simply saying that whatever it is we do. It will be done best if we are intune with ourselves. Meaning, to have trust, safety, love flowing through me in the activity. Anger, wanting to prove something, and grit for example are also very powerful emotions and motivation. However, for optimum mind-body connection we must allow the nervous system to be open. Open so that life can flow though us. The athlete who can remain calm is often times the best! Same for the artist!
Playing musical instruments can be so natural for us. If we truly feel and hear the music inside of us then it’s just a matter of learning good technique and practicing in a good state of being.
Where meditation comes in:
Okay so now we know that if we want to play an instrument our best. We must be at our best inside!
There are many forms of meditation. And i will be sharing specific techniques in upcoming blogs, but for now i will say:
Before you sit down and practice:
-take time to let go of your day. If it has been a busy day at school, or at the office/jobsite then just acknowledge inside that that is where we are coming from
-bring awareness to the body. The slower and more curious we can be about how our body feels, without judgment! the more “inside” of our body we will be. This is how we can begin to attune to ourselves
-breathe! So many techniques we can discuss but for now just try 2-6 consecutive deep inhalations and exhalations
-move the body. Sometimes our body does not desire stillness but desires movement! If you need to run around, shake, dance, or express words, sound etc then do it! Any form of intentional movement is going to work great here!
The reality:
Attention span is a real thing and we must practice cultivating it daily or else we can cultivate other more distracting habits
For children 0-4: I would simply recommend more quiet time. Time outside, in nature, or even just at home in our coziest spot. We are natural meditators at this age so I would keep it simple! Sometimes my 3 year old catches me in my morning meditation and she actually will actually come and cuddle up next to me in stillness. This reminds me that as adults our children attune to us! And our state of being. Believe me, I’m not always zen-ed out. And I know my daughter and students can feel when I’m not really present.
Children ages 4-7: We are still natural meditators at this age :) However now we can start to bring in different meditation techniques/practices but lets keep it fun! The breath is a great place to start. Ask your child to: take 3 very slow deep inhales and exhales, then observe how and where the breath natural flows and moves in the body, then 3 slow breaths again, then observe and repeat. This can really help anchor a child back in! Much more I could say on this that it deserves a blog post in itself
Children ages 7-13: Okay here the analytical/thinking mind is growing. And growing fast! But hey we are still natural meditators here too! With how busy kid’s lives are with stuff at this age group, we may need to set a timer. 2 minutes. Eyes closed. And just breathe! OR, hand over heart, and feel heart beat for 3 minutes. These are just some examples. More to come
Children ages 13 + : Some serious meditation can be done here! But the technique must should resonate with the person. Starting short and small is still key. Include all that the previous age groups have done but know that at this age the attention span must be continually sharpened. In a loving way of course!
Adults: Let’s keep it simple. In fact, if you have no meditation experience that is often times the best. Because you have no expectations on the process and you can sometimes enter flow state much easier this way. If you have a very active analytical mind, then we must acknowledge that and be patient with ourselves!
Specific practices:
I will be writing very specific practices in upcoming blog posts! If this sparked some curiousity but left you with questions about how to help yourself/your child meditate, then please contact me! I’m happy to share specific advice. I really wanted to just go general here and start to introduce the idea of meditation and how it can benefit our lives!
Talk to you all soon. All the best
-Nazaret Castillo
Published: February 5, 2025